//Wanderer Wondering
Wanderer Wondering

? Anonymous Emotion
Thursday, 13 December 2012 ? 00:35 ? 0 comments
Its another day. 121212 was just as insignificant as any other days. Today, i dont know why but it feels like i needed to post this. I dont know whats on my mind when i write this but surely im stuck in a world full of dreams and hope. I dont know why im telling you this, but it feels like i belong in somewhere else just like in the movies. I just cant express it all so im sorry that i cant tell you in detail. 
So i created this so called essay or novel (i dont know what to call it) and i just wanted to share it to you. I have been keeping this for like a month now  and i intended to continue writing it because its not even finish yet but i didnt. So please forgive me and my grammar error.

   I can feel the fire burns out of my mind and whole of my body. But there’s this little thing inside of me shivering and longing for what it seems like forever to achieve. I've been alive, like a statue that never grows old but dust grows besides me, people that I know were long gone and I am indeed alone.


Yeah that was the word that has seemed to be my best friend the moment I involuntarily became what I was now.

For now, I wouldn’t want to say what I am actually. Just let it be a mystery for all human being out there. To not know the truth because truth isn’t always nice, I would have to keep whatever it takes to shut the ones who shouldn’t know. My life was about to change. As I have met a pair of black brown eyes who dazed me.

“I have black brown eyes too” I said it out too loud.  The last time I checked. It wouldn’t be so strange to see that but those eyes even though similar to me but there was something different. I really don’t know. Ever since I become what I had become now, all of my five senses were stronger. But I couldn’t use it against him. It was like something instantly blurred me out. Maybe him or is it me who is just mesmerized by him. The black brown eyes.

I was so mesmerized by his eyes I didn’t even look at his other feature. I didn’t even know how he looked like. Now I promise myself that if I ever meet him again, I will try to look the whole him only If those eyes won’t distract me to look at him, not in the eyes because for once, I wanted to know him. I really didn’t care if he was a just a human or not.

Now it occurs to me what if he’s a human or if he’s not. What will I do?

I couldn’t bear the thought to know if he was human because I have a rule for human. And I couldn’t bear the thought if he was like me because I didn’t like what I had become now.

Both choices weren’t so suitable for me to choose.

   I was sipping my second orange juice for the day until someone had said something behind me that I couldn’t concentrate on because I rarely talk people nevertheless hearing them talking. I turn my head back when I saw this guy smiling at me.

‘Rough day?’ he said. And I saw a crooked smile coming from him. And from that, I could instantly know that he wanted to flirt with me. I had to deal with this every time I go to the café just to have a decent drink by myself.

   There’s this thing about me. One of my superpowers was that I had the ability to think or to wonder around before I could talk. Here’s the catch, for them, they think I answered them less in a second but I have been thinking long enough to answer them. As if I had paused the time when actually I’m not. Our time is actually very slow from the human. We were considered fast in the human time if one can notice but for our kind there would be always someone to be called weak or strong. I was one of them who are considered strong because I, before becoming what I am today I was a girl who was always on runways. The first day I ran away from my parents was for a ……

I instantly shook the feeling about my past life. I didn’t want to remember it because I was surely going to cry at that moment. And then I remembered the guy who was asking me 5-6 minutes ago and I look at him.

‘Yeah, I guess.’ That was all I could say after thinking. He didn’t even realize that I was thinking too long for me to answer because he’s a human.
‘Mind if I join y..’
‘No’ I said before finishing his word.
He stumbled backward for a second I thought he was going to go away but then he.
‘I wouldn’t want to hear no for an answer. I prefer if you could say yes’ He smiled too good and too long for me so that I could see his so called charming look.
‘It is still a no for me. Find another girl and I promise you I won’t hurt your time or balls’ I smiled back at him and then gave him the fiercest look just to show him how much I was a danger to him. He noticed that I was indeed dangerous so he raise his hands up to show defeat of joining me for an orange juice. He left and I was laughing inside. That B word would always scare the hell out of men who had the nerve asking me if they could join me.
But still I couldn’t blame them for asking me because I was indeed not ordinary than the other human girls out there. My features were so shaped up after I transformed and I had become more beautiful. But not as beautiful as other girls who were the same kind like me. I admit they were more beautiful.

   I remembered the day that I open my eyes to a new but soon to become lonely life. There were several girls surrounding me and smiling at me. I had no idea what they were smiling because I was totally shock not because I was surrounded by these unfamiliar girls but for the features they had.
Eyes blooming like flowers with white snow covered a little but still able to shine through, nose perfectly structured like Barbie dolls, lips with some of them small and some big but still had the right proportion for their face, hair so wavy but still manage to look so natural, and most of all they were flawless. No freckle, wrinkle nor scar to be found. They were simply beautiful.
‘Hi.’ One of the girls said
I didn’t answer.
‘I think she can’t hear us. Did we do something wrong?’ The other girl said
They whispered to each other words that I can’t hear. The only thing that I was able to hear was the sound of the wind. But I suspect it was them because there was no breeze. The sound of the wind had

carried their words making it difficult for me to understand as I try to hear them. Suddenly one of the girls who were different from them but still beautiful approached me.
‘Take a deep breath and release your tension.’ She said
And I did. I did what she told me too. I didn’t know why should I do it but I really need someone to tell me what was going on.

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